I have a friend who -I was convinced, for many years since graduation from high school- would show me what it means to live like a gypsy- free spirited and passionate to the core. She is my nominee for 'Most Likely to Have an Unconventional, Enviable Life'. She was the first friend I knew with a real tattoo, who would flash it when we changed to our pjk clothes in the girls' toilet. Piercings. Many boyfriends. Lovers even at school. Who probably gave me the guts to skip SPM Add Math Trial Paper for dimsum. (as you can see, I'm hardly rebellious.. =P)
To a certain extend she has gone places with that go-for-it attitude. She's bagged her own trance singles, hitting the indie charts with it. Pulled off her own photography exhibition. Found her own life.
I have lesser but equally bizarre exposure to what dreams may look like in real life. Freshly graduated, and being quickly and easily hired by one of the most successful and well known brand in fashion history was a dream that shouldn't have been. And moving out on my own anticulturally was something that gave me a real high. So did planning my great escape to the UK for more successes.
Yet funnily, when it comes to this life, this world, this system - we're scarily similar in that we're both struggling to fit in. There is a nagging need, or is it pressure, to 'grow up' and leave dreams behind. To settle down and start working for the system. That is to find a job suitable for your degree, match the stereotype, get to the grind and move up. Because somehow it isn't a horizontal journey of interesting experiences, twists and turns, like our minds imagined while we were innocent. Mature living sees life more like a neverending ladder, hill, slope, whatever you may call it that goes upwards. It's all about upgrading yourself.
So where does that leave those who are grappling at the bottom of that hill... still wondering if we should embark on the journey or if we're even cut out for it? Those who've gone ahead may look at us in dismay, such cowardly and unfocused individuals. Tsktsk. But what if I really prefer to take the scenic, less travelled route?
To carve our own path, and to find out about unspoken dreams and how it may come true for us if we dared it. To find surprises in store for those who look in hidden places. I so want to discover what it is my heart beats and bleeds for... desires that may have been left at the door while entering into 'adulthood' as well as those I've yet to be introduced to but is inside of me.
You may say I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one
[No reality check for me today, please]
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We succeeded.